The Show Must Go On?
I am currently doing a “cleanse”. I use quotations marks because its not the traditional no food-lemon water-cayan pepper-only thing that you think of when you hear “cleanse”. I’m simply doing a month of healthy eating and absolutely no alcohol.
This cleanse is important to me. To be healthy, soulful, and disciplined. It was a simple yet meaningful act I was going to do. I kept my promise for 5 days and broke it last night. But not out of a weak will.
Our weekly Saturday night improv show here at Boom is called ‘Shot of Improv’. When we hear a good suggestion, or use an audience member on stage, we give them a free shot. Last night I was hosting a game, brought an audience member up for an interview, and one of my castmates brought over a shot for him, and unexpectedly, a shot for me too.
Without blinking an eye I took it.
But in that blink I quickly thought the following: “Absolutely not, I am not drinking right now”, “I can easily have him do it, it won’t be weird”, “That may ruin the momentum of the show for a split second”, “It’s only a split second, it will be a small hiccup if noticed at all”, “No, even a small hiccup is a compromise”, ”The show is the most important thing”, “The show must go on, do it.” So I did. I’m allergic to vodka, and had this been a vodka shot, I think I would’ve done the exact same thing.
My Dad is the reason I got into acting. He was never a professional actor, but did tons of theatre throughout my childhood. From community theatre to the Gilbert & Sullivan Society in D.C. I never had a babysitter, I would go sit and watch his rehearsals instead. I grew up in the audience watching directors, actors, stage managers, and its how I got my interest in all of this. And the simple mantra of “The Show Must Go On” got engrained in me at a very young age. Its a simple and obvious motto, but where do you draw the line?
In high-school my girlfriend broke her finger on stage during a play. I saw it happen fron the stage left wing. She was in serious pain, clenched her teeth, but didn’t drop a single line or moment in the show. She just held her hand and gritted through. My love for her doubled watching that.
I hate watching uncommitted actors/improvisers. You have to put your everything into every moment of a show or its not worth it.
But where do you draw the line?
Today, I feel terrible. Like I broke a promise. Like I lied to myself.
At what point do you have to pause the momentum of a show for a reality check? How bad would it really have been for me to deny that shot? I think if I broke my arm on stage I’d want to at least keep going until intermission to go to the hospital. But that’s insane. I realize how out of whack that is, and how the priority on health and general safety should come first. Also how any sane audience member would WANT me to stop the show and leave. Hell, If I was watching I would want that too.
I do firmly believe the show must go on, but the line is starting to get blurry.
